Monday, 25 April 2016

University First Year.

It started off with me feeling like why am I doing a multimedia course when I am not going to be a journalist but I realise this course is helping me in a lot of different ways. It is really helping me to learn all the different aspects of being a journalist. Helps my confidence to grow more and more and I things I wouldn’t dare have attempted or thought through I just now think screw it I will give it ago.

I feel like its only bizarre that after a year of the course I realise this is a great choice of course, I have a real passion for photography and real dedication to succeed in furthering in. But this has many different learning curbs which I feel like I have grown to enjoy which makes me think I didn’t give it a chance and that I really regret that, though I think this would probably be down to me not enjoying being so far away and stuck in this ridiculously small box room, hating everyone (people I share a kitchen with). Where ever I go I always end up back home which is not what I wanted, just to stand on my own two feet and grow the hell up! this would only happen I feel coming to university is a rather good first step.


It is very rarely I meet people and make a strong friendship with, though be honest I did think I would make a lot of friends at university but thinking about it properly, I could go anywhere in the world and it would be exactly the same. I guess friendships are not massively important to me because I have my family, I see it as I don’t care I am to now go home after being where ever outside of the house (the nest) I see it as getting away from the ridiculous people I get faced with. University will get more stuck out there I guess because I can not exactly run home it takes 3 hours on a train, I shall suck it up.

Thursday, 7 April 2016

When you have days left with your mother you seek a journey that will help you remember and never forget her. Left in the hands of someone else’s care, leaving you forever questioning if things would have been a different goodbye.

Holding on to that last precious moments filling them with memories, family, hope and love.
We all sometimes believe everything happens for a reason, when you have those last few days journey broken down, you pin point every detail to feel, every different bit of emotion that you did and did not feel. 

If you have that connection, I believe that this bond is unbreakable between spirit and life. She will come for you as protection to the next path, guide you into another world which you wouldn’t imagine existed in your own belief throughout life. 
Have seen some who realized it must have been too late or will never accept in any kind of regret. The thought of not letting go of that person is selfish, reason would end in heartache because of them leaving you behind. 

Even 9 years later “I Love You” will go unnoticed in her illness, you really need a card, chocolates or flowers? Actions speak louder than words.

Companies can take over our minds to get you thinking what they want, spending your money how they want so do any of us think what we want? Probably not.

It becomes a day of money, popularity and losing all meaning in the process, I wouldn’t make it mother’s day the only day I appreciate.

Wednesday, 23 September 2015


                            What things did you create when you was a child?



When i was a child i was always so creative, i would draw pictures for my family, build small homes for me and my teddies to play in but i mostly enjoyed making up those games where you would have to use your imagination completely, this is something i do think you lose as you get older which gives you more of a child like innocent.
Growing up i have started to slowly forget about all the games you played with my brothers and sisters also how much fun it was in the playground making up those stories only my 5 year old self would think up. Everyone has one at least one bed time story they can remember, you know the one you would ask your mum or dad to read every night.

I always find it amazing what i do remember when looking back through pictures and albums then being told how old i was when it was taken this just fascinates me, that i remembered something so clearly at a young age. This particular photo i found of myself in the garden in a pretty yellow flower dress, though i was crying in the picture i remember this all so well even though i was only around 3 years old.

Certain memories stick in your brain good or bad, i hope to remember being a small child forever..